How fathers in Gaza are coping with the ‘immense weight of responsibility’

Special How fathers in Gaza are coping with the ‘immense weight of responsibility’
Months under Israeli bombardment and the specter of famine have placed additional strain on fathers in Gaza, whose inability to shield their young sons and daughters from the horrors of war is exacting a heavy psychological toll. (Reuters)
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Updated 21 March 2024
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How fathers in Gaza are coping with the ‘immense weight of responsibility’

How fathers in Gaza are coping with the ‘immense weight of responsibility’
  • Inability to shield young sons and daughters from the horrors of war can produce feelings of anger and guilt
  • Looming famine places additional strain on fathers, who are traditionally the primary household breadwinners

LONDON: Ahmed’s plans for his eagerly anticipated first child were shattered when the Israeli military bombed his home in Sabra, in western Gaza, on Oct. 26 last year.

In his telling, among the possessions destroyed in the attack was a nursery that he and his wife had lovingly decorated.

“All the preparations we made to ensure our first baby arrives in a beautiful world have been completely overturned,” Ahmed, 28, an expectant Palestinian father now displaced to Rafah in southern Gaza, told Arab News.

“The onslaught has shattered our dreams for our baby girl. The nursery, our home, and the family house have all been turned to rubble.”




The Israeli government says its military does not target civilians or hospitals. (AFP)

Since the Hamas-led attack of Oct. 7 that triggered Israel’s continued military offensive in Gaza, countless images from the embattled enclave have shown fathers carrying their wounded children, cradling their lifeless bodies, and pleading for help for their starving families.

One video that caught the world’s attention in November showed a Palestinian father holding his lifeless daughter in his arms, reminiscing about her life, and calling her in Arabic “the soul of my soul,” which conveys profound love and affection.

Expected to protect and provide for their families, fathers in Gaza are shouldering “an immense weight of responsibility,” Jeeda Alhakim, a specialist counseling psychologist at City, University of London, told Arab News.

These fathers “may want to try to shield their children from the harsh realities of the war,” said Alhakim, but “it is very difficult in Gaza to do so because there is no sense of safety for anyone at this stage.”

At the same time, fathers in Gaza are “struggling with trauma themselves and may be grieving in the same way that their children would be.”

Often the primary breadwinner in Palestinian households, fathers are frequently under “a lot of strain” if they are unable to provide for their families.

“This may also evoke a range of different feelings, such as anger, irritability, low sense of self or low moods, as well as anxiety and stress.”

Many fathers, concerned about their children’s future “may also feel guilt, as they are unable to protect their children,” Alhakim added.




Fathers in Gaza “may experience feelings of helplessness and powerlessness as they strive to protect and provide for their families and their children but find themselves unable to do so,” Jeeda Alhakim said. (AFP)

At least 13,000 Palestinian children have been killed since the conflict began, according to UNICEF, the UN children’s agency.

With famine looming due to the prolonged siege, the destruction of infrastructure, and aid failing to reach families in northern Gaza, fathers in some areas have resorted to scavenging rotten vegetables, leaves, and even animal feed to alleviate their children’s hunger.

On Monday, the EU’s top diplomat, Josep Borrell, accused Israel of using starvation as a weapon of war in Gaza. Speaking at a conference in Brussels, he said the enclave was now “in a state of famine, affecting thousands of people.”

Under these circumstances, fathers in Gaza “may experience feelings of helplessness and powerlessness as they strive to protect and provide for their families and their children but find themselves unable to do so,” said Alhakim.

Earlier this month, one father in Gaza encapsulated the desperation of many Palestinian families in an interview with BBC Arabic’s Gaza Lifeline radio service after his baby son, Ali, died of malnutrition and dehydration.

“Ali was born in wartime and there was no food or anything for his mother to eat — a matter which caused his kidneys to fail,” he told the BBC.




At least 13,000 Palestinian children have been killed since the conflict began, according to UNICEF. (AFP)

The UN Relief and Works Agency for Palestine Refugees in the Near East, UNRWA, warned on Saturday that one in three children under the age of two in Gaza is acutely malnourished.

This extremely vulnerable group includes the more than 20,000 babies born in Gaza since the start of the war, according to UNICEF.

The trauma familiar to these young families has perhaps been more keenly felt by those who had struggled to become pregnant before the conflict. What should have been a happy miracle has instead turned into a terrifying responsibility.

Ahmed said he and his wife underwent several medical tests after two years of trying for a child. They were told exposure to toxic fumes from a past Israeli bombing incident had affected Ahmed’s fertility.

INNUMBERS

• 20k+ Babies born in Gaza since the outbreak of war.

• 13k+ Children killed in Gaza since Oct. 7.

• 1/3 Children under age 2 deemed malnourished.

After undergoing treatment for several months, the couple finally managed to conceive. “I was overcome with joy when my wife told me she was pregnant,” said Ahmed.

“Before the hostilities, my wife was in her second trimester, and so we were decorating the baby’s room in our home and buying baby clothes. All of that is gone, and we can’t replace the lost baby clothes because these are no longer available in Gaza’s markets. Diapers and baby formula are also very hard to find and come at exorbitant prices.”

Ahmad and his wife have also lost the doctor who was scheduled to deliver their daughter.




Many fathers, concerned about their children’s future “may also feel guilt, as they are unable to protect their children,” Jeeda Alhakim said. (AFP)

“Even the doctor who was supposed to deliver our baby is no longer here — she managed to flee because, I think, she has a Russian passport,” said Ahmad. “There is no adequate hospital for my wife to have our baby.”

The World Health Organization says only 30 percent of Gaza’s medics are still working.

Meanwhile, just nine of Gaza’s 36 health facilities are still functioning, most only partially, and all at many times their intended capacity after months under intense bombardment and supply shortages.

The Israeli government says its military does not target civilians or hospitals, and blames Hamas for conducting military operations and launching rockets from crowded residential areas.

Ahmed said he is deeply concerned for his wife’s well-being in displacement. “The living conditions are particularly harsh for pregnant women,” he said. “There is no food or drinking water.”

At least 60,000 pregnant women in Gaza suffer from malnutrition, dehydration, and a lack of access to healthcare, according to Gaza’s health ministry.




Since Oct.7, countless images from Gaza have shown fathers carrying their wounded children, cradling their lifeless bodies, and pleading for help for their starving families. (AFP)

Earlier this month, the ministry said about 5,000 women are going into labor each month amid “harsh, unsafe and unhealthy conditions as a result of bombardment and displacement.”

Many have undergone C-sections without any anesthetic, pain relief, sterilization, or antibiotics. Babies are often born on floors and into tin baths filled with warm water.

New parents bringing life into the world amid these extreme conditions suffer “a loss of potential identity and purpose,” said Alhakim.

“If they have a sense of identity that’s attached to parenthood or to being a father, or if they find purpose in taking care of their children — then the war in Gaza has stripped them of this.”


Missing US journalist's mother says new Syria leaders 'determined' to find son

Missing US journalist's mother says new Syria leaders 'determined' to find son
Updated 14 sec ago
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Missing US journalist's mother says new Syria leaders 'determined' to find son

Missing US journalist's mother says new Syria leaders 'determined' to find son
DAMASCUS: The mother of US journalist Austin Tice, who went missing in Syria in 2012, said on Monday in Damascus that the war-torn country's new leadership was committed to finding him.
Tice was working as a freelance journalist for Agence France-Presse, McClatchy News, The Washington Post, CBS and other media outlets when he was detained at a checkpoint in August 2012.
"I have been privileged to meet with the new leadership of Syria," Debra Tice told journalists in Damascus, after holding talks with Syria's new leader Ahmed al-Sharaa.
"It was so wonderful to learn that they are dedicated and determined to bring home my son, and your son," she added.
She expressed hope the incoming administration of Donald Trump, who takes office as US president later on Monday, will work to bring her son home.
"Today... Trump will be sworn into office and a page will be turned," she said.
"I have great hope that the Trump administration will be very engaged in diligent work to bring Austin home.
"I look forward to working closely with the team, including National Security Advisor Mike Waltz and Special Presidential Envoy Adam Logan."
Debra Tice said she was "looking forward" to engaging with the Trump administration.
"His people have already reached out to me," she said.
"I haven't experienced that for the last four years, and so I'm very much looking forward to their help and involvement, and I think they're going to be quick at it."
Last month, US officials said Syria's new leadership had assisted in the hunt for Tice, including searches at sites of interest.
"We feel it's our duty as the US government to press on until we know with certainty what happened to him, where he is and to bring him home," said Roger Carstens, the US pointman on hostages.
He made the remarks during the first visit to Damascus by US officials since Islamist-led forces toppled autocratic Syrian president Bashar al-Assad.

Yemen’s Houthis say to limit attacks in the Red Sea corridor

Yemen’s Houthis say to limit attacks in the Red Sea corridor
Updated 41 min 17 sec ago
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Yemen’s Houthis say to limit attacks in the Red Sea corridor

Yemen’s Houthis say to limit attacks in the Red Sea corridor
  • Houthis have targeted about 100 merchant vessels with missiles and drones since the Gaza conflict erupted in October 2023

DUBAI: Yemen’s Houthi militia have signaled they will limit their attacks in the Red Sea corridor to only Israeli-affiliated ships as a ceasefire in the Gaza Strip took hold.
The Houthis made the announcement in an email sent to shippers and others on Sunday. The Houthis separately planned a military statement on Monday, likely about the decision.
The Houthis, through their Humanitarian Operations Coordination Center, made the announcement by saying it was “stopping sanctions” on the other vessels it has previously targeted since it started attacks in November 2023.
The Houthis have targeted about 100 merchant vessels with missiles and drones since the Israel-Hamas war in the Gaza Strip started in October 2023, after Hamas’ surprise attack on Israel that killed 1,200 people and saw 250 others taken hostage.
The Houthis have seized one vessel and sunk two in a campaign that has also killed four sailors. Other missiles and drones have either been intercepted by separate US- and European-led coalitions in the Red Sea or failed to reach their targets, which have also included Western military vessels.


China ‘welcomes’ Gaza ceasefire coming into effect

China ‘welcomes’ Gaza ceasefire coming into effect
Updated 20 January 2025
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China ‘welcomes’ Gaza ceasefire coming into effect

China ‘welcomes’ Gaza ceasefire coming into effect
  • China has historically been sympathetic to the Palestinian cause and supportive of a two-state solution to the Israel-Palestinian conflict

BEJING: China on Monday hailed the start of a long-awaited truce aimed at ending more than 15 months of war in Gaza.
A ceasefire agreement between Israel and Hamas formally entered into force on Sunday, paving the way for the exchange of Palestinian prisoners and Israeli hostages.
A spokeswoman for Beijing’s foreign ministry said “China welcomes the Gaza ceasefire agreement coming into effect.”
“We hope that the agreement will be fully and continuously implemented, and that a comprehensive and permanent ceasefire in Gaza will be achieved,” Mao Ning said at a regular press briefing.
“China will continue to work with the international community to promote peace and stability in the Middle East,” she said.
China has historically been sympathetic to the Palestinian cause and supportive of a two-state solution to the Israel-Palestinian conflict.
It has positioned itself as a more neutral actor on the conflict than its rival the United States, but has repeatedly called on Israel to end what it calls humanitarian disasters in Gaza.
Last summer, China hosted rival Palestinian factions Hamas and Fatah in Beijing, where they signed an agreement to form a “national unity government” in Gaza after the end of hostilities.


UAE launches largest Gaza aid operation as truce starts

UAE launches largest Gaza aid operation as truce starts
Updated 20 January 2025
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UAE launches largest Gaza aid operation as truce starts

UAE launches largest Gaza aid operation as truce starts
  • 20 trucks carry essential food supplies, winter clothing and basic necessities 

DUBAI: The UAE has launched its largest relief operation in Gaza, under Operation Chivalrous Knight 3, as the Hamas-Israel ceasefire took effect on Sunday.

A convoy of 20 trucks carried over 200 tonnes of essential humanitarian aid including food, winter clothing and other basic necessities for Palestinian families impacted by Israel’s war on Gaza.

To date, Operation Chivalrous Knight 3 has already sent 156 convoys to Gaza, amounting to about 29,784 tonnes of humanitarian aid.

This aid has significantly alleviated the challenging circumstances faced by Gaza’s residents, particularly the most vulnerable groups, by meeting their basic needs, state news agency WAM reported.

Operation Chivalrous Knight 3 has been in operation for over 441 days and has overseen over 500 planeloads of aid, five transport ships, and more than 2,500 trucks from Egypt into Gaza, WAM added.

The UAE’s projects include a field hospital in Gaza, and a floating hospital in Arish, Egypt.

In addition, the country has overseen water supply projects including the construction of desalination plants in Rafah, Egypt, and the “Birds of Goodness” initiative, which involves airdropping aid to areas inaccessible by land, notably in northern Gaza.


Israel frees 90 Palestinian prisoners as ceasefire takes hold after Hamas returns 3 Israeli hostages

Israel frees 90 Palestinian prisoners as ceasefire takes hold after Hamas returns 3 Israeli hostages
Updated 20 January 2025
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Israel frees 90 Palestinian prisoners as ceasefire takes hold after Hamas returns 3 Israeli hostages

Israel frees 90 Palestinian prisoners as ceasefire takes hold after Hamas returns 3 Israeli hostages
  • Palestinians across Gaza return home as first trucks with humanitarian aid enter devastated territory
  • Israel’s military, which occupies the West Bank, had warned Palestinians against public celebration

RAMALLAH, West Bank: The first three hostages were released from Gaza and the first Palestinian prisoners were freed from Israeli custody as the fragile ceasefire between Israel and Hamas took hold following 15 months of war, with mixed emotions and more difficult steps ahead over the next six weeks.
Palestinians across Gaza began making their way home, and the first trucks with a surge of humanitarian aid began to enter the devastated territory.
The ceasefire that began on Sunday morning raises hopes for ending the devastating conflict and returning the nearly 100 remaining hostages abducted in Hamas’ Oct. 7, 2023, attack. But major questions remain about whether fighting will resume after the six-week first phase.
First came the release of Emily Damari, 28; Romi Gonen, 24, and Doron Steinbrecher, 31, in a tense handover to the Red Cross on a Gaza City street. Footage showed them surrounded by a crowd of thousands, accompanied by masked, armed men wearing green Hamas headbands.
The women were taken to Israeli forces and then into Israel, where they hugged family members fiercely and wept. Damari was shown raising her bandaged hand in triumph. The military said she lost two fingers in the Oct. 7 attack.
In Tel Aviv, thousands of people who gathered to watch the news on large screens erupted in applause. For months, many had gathered in the square weekly to demand a ceasefire deal.
“An entire nation embraces you,” Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said.
Over seven hours later, the first Palestinian prisoners were released. They had been detained for what Israel called offenses related to its security, from throwing stones to more serious accusations such as attempted murder.
Israel’s military, which occupies the West Bank, warned Palestinians against public celebration — the release took place after 1 a.m. — but crowds thronged the buses after they left the prison, some people climbing on top or waving flags, including those of Hamas.
There were fireworks and whistles, and shouts of “God is great.” Those released were hoisted onto others’ shoulders or embraced.
The most prominent detainee freed was Khalida Jarrar, 62, a member of a secular leftist faction that was involved in attacks against Israel in the 1970s but later scaled back militant activities. Since her arrest in late 2023, she was held under indefinitely renewable administrative detention orders that were criticized by human rights groups.
The next release of hostages and prisoners is due on Saturday, with 33 hostages and nearly 2,000 Palestinian prisoners and detainees to be freed over the ceasefire’s 42-day first phase. In just over two weeks, talks are to begin on the far more challenging second phase.
This is just the second ceasefire in the war, longer and more consequential than a weeklong pause in November 2023, with the potential to end the fighting for good.
But Netanyahu, who had been under pressure from both the Biden administration and President-elect Donald Trump to achieve a deal before Monday’s US inauguration, has said he has Trump’s backing to continue fighting if necessary.
Meanwhile, Israel’s hard-line national security minister said his Jewish Power faction was quitting the government in protest over the ceasefire, reflecting the political friction that some Israelis said delayed a deal. Itamar Ben-Gvir’s departure weakens Netanyahu’s coalition but will not affect the truce.
‘Joy mixed with pain’
Across Gaza, there was relief and grief. The fighting has killed tens of thousands, destroyed large areas and displaced most of the population.
“This ceasefire was a joy mixed with pain, because my son was martyred in this war,” said Rami Nofal, a displaced man from Gaza City.
Masked militants appeared at some celebrations, where crowds chanted slogans in support of them, according to Associated Press reporters in Gaza. The Hamas-run police began deploying in public after mostly lying low due to Israeli airstrikes.
Some families set off for home on foot, their belongings loaded on donkey carts.
In the southern city of Rafah, residents returned to find massive destruction. Some found human remains in the rubble, including skulls.
“It’s like you see in a Hollywood horror movie,” resident Mohamed Abu Taha said as he inspected the ruins of his family’s home.
Already, Israeli forces were pulling back from areas. Residents of Beit Lahiya and Jabaliya in northern Gaza told the AP they didn’t see Israeli troops there.
One resident said they saw bodies in the streets that appeared to have been there for weeks.
Israelis divided over deal
In Israel, people remained divided over the agreement.
Asher Pizem, 35, from the city of Sderot, said the deal had merely postponed the next confrontation with Hamas. He also criticized Israel for allowing aid into Gaza, saying it would contribute to the militant group’s revival.
“They will take the time and attack again,” he said while viewing Gaza’s smoldering ruins from a small hill in southern Israel with other Israelis gathered there.
When President Joe Biden was asked Sunday whether he has any concerns about Hamas regrouping, he said no.
Immense toll
The toll of the war has been immense, and new details will now emerge. The head of the Rafah municipality in Gaza, Ahmed Al-Sufi, said a large part of the infrastructure, including water, electricity and road networks, was destroyed, in addition to thousands of homes.
There should be a surge of humanitarian aid, with hundreds of trucks entering Gaza daily, far more than Israel allowed before. The UN humanitarian agency said more than 630 trucks with aid entered on Sunday, with at least 300 going to hard-hit northern Gaza.
“This is a moment of tremendous hope,” humanitarian chief Tom Fletcher said.
Over 46,000 Palestinians have been killed, according to Gaza’s Health Ministry, which says women and children make up more than half the fatalities but does not distinguish between civilians and fighters.
The Hamas-led attack on southern Israel that sparked the war killed over 1,200 people, mostly civilians, and militants abducted around 250 others. More than 100 hostages were freed during the weeklong ceasefire in November 2023.
Some 90 percent of Gaza’s population has been displaced. Rebuilding — if the ceasefire reaches its final phase — will take several years at least. Major questions about Gaza’s future, political and otherwise, remain unresolved.